Question
You called telling friends about your trauma a dysfunctional attempt at a solution. Still, you'd think it's comforting...
For my part, I am a coach but I also have to accompany clients in situations of great stress.
Comment
There's a big difference between talking to friends right after the traumatic event and talking about it long after, over and over again...
Just after the trauma, talking and sharing helps to find comfort and that is very important. The problem arises when talking becomes an attempt at a solution because by talking, the person becomes dependent on the help of others and fails to understand that he could manage his problem on his own.
Talking about a situation in general is not a problem in itself; it depends on the effects produced and a very useful thing right after an event can become dysfunctional over time.
In companies, we find this type of situation, when transformations occur, when employees are faced with a fait accompli without the possibility of asserting their point of view. They pour out, which makes them feel good, makes them feel united with each other, neutralizes their fear, but the problem then becomes collective.
But, if it is collective, union in this case not being strong, it turns into collective resignation and depreciation, which makes individual situations even more hopeless. It is therefore appropriate in this case to cut short.
